i have no property, no knowledge, no expensive gift to share but....

i have this prayer which was given by a dear best friend (you know who you are) to share with all of you. In times like these, prayer serves to comfort me and give me hope for better days.

Prayer to St Joseph

Oh, St. Joseph, whose protection is so great, so strong, 

so prompt before the throne of God. 

I place in you all my interest and desires. 

Oh, St. Joseph, do help me by your powerful intercession, 

and obtain for me from your divine Son and spiritual blessings, 

through Jesus Christ, our Lord. So that, having engaged 

here below your heavenly power, I may offer my thanksgiving 

and homage to the most loving of Fathers. Oh, St Joseph,

I never weary contemplating you and Jesus asleep in your arms, 

I dare not approach while He reposes near your heart. 

Press Him in my name and kiss His fine head for me and 

ask Him to return the kiss wen I draw my dying breath. 

St Joseph, patron of departing souls - Pray for us. 

 Image grabbed from here.

Say for nine mornings for anything you may desire. It has never known to fail, so be sure you really want what you ask.

Winning Makes My World Go Round~!

I should had blogged about this long time ago but because I was truly demotivated to blog, I didn't. And now after completing my LHP 456 interview, which happens to be the last of the assessment too (hooray!), I must now thank Nuffnang & Digi angels for giving me a wonderful smartphone, Blackberry Torch 9800, besides letting me enjoy the pleasure of winning something. Not to forget, a lot of credits to my gangsta sista Mel Chua for helping me to take it from the Nuffnang office in KL (imagine all the hassles she had gone through just to find the office and take this phone lol). And  last but not least, there is someone who is more important that I should thank above all.

Maybe I did tell people around me that when I joined this contest, I didn't put in much efforts and didn't think of winning. But in actual, I really wanted to win it, it was just that, as usual, I was not confident in winning it. 

And maybe I did tell that this winning was all based on my luck, without efforts. But it wasn't the whole truth. I forgot to mention something.

Something important which I had taken for granted since I'm too engrossed on deluding myself with the thoughts that I'm lucky. 

It was prayer that I've forgotten to mention when I won this. I prayed. Almost everyday when I had my 3 pm Divine Mercy prayer, I prayed to win this contest.

But I forgot. (-_-")

And actually, during that time, my intention of winning this smart phone was not for myself, but for my mother. I remembered Mama saying that at her age (which is not young anymore, ahem!), she was still using the basic handphone which she took good care of, and me, I already lost two phones with better features than hers. Lol. I felt guilty, and felt bad for her at the same time. I mean, here I am losing phone here and there, while some others in my family members have to take good care of their belongings no matter how old or basic the model is. And at that time, I wanted to win this for Mama  so badly since I already had my Xperia (which I felt guilty too for owning it when the rest of my family including my sister who already worked didn't indulge in smart phones and great gadgets like I do, hmmmph).

  Thus, I prayed Divine Mercy diligently, voicing out intention to win this phone for my mother. I'm not a good daughter, I'm rebellious, I think I'm a black sheep of the family because I always do things against her wishes, and there's nothing other thing I can do for her, except for winning this for her. 

And I was really lucky blessed that my prayer was answered. 

And when I finally knew I won this, it felt surreal. I was happy! I felt that I was the luckiest person on earth! And I was so deluded thinking I was lucky till I forgot that it was due to my diligent prayers that I won this. 

When I was at home that time, I remembered my initial intention to win this phone for Mama and then during one fine afternoon, while I was looking for her white hair a.k.a uban in the living room, I told her this:

Me: Ma, this phone that I won, though I haven't get it, when I finally got it, do you want it?

Mama: Why? (Surprised)

Me: Because actually mama, I promised Jesus that I wanted to win this phone for you, because I know that you think that your phone are not as modern, but lauya hahahhahaa. Anyway, I already have a smart phone, and I think maybe this phone could be great for you so that you can use nice phones like your colleagues since you're the headmistress, should use the better phones than them. :P You already worked for so long, don't kalah with other teachers. Hoho.

Mama: (Smiling maybe amused at my sudden intention which is not always, you know ahaha) Aiya, not need la. I don't know how to use canggih-canggih things. You use that phone yourself la. I already have a phone.

Me: Really??

Mama: Really. I already have this phone. I don't need and I don't know how to use that kind of phone.

Me: Okay, like that thank you lo. At least I don't feel so bad since I already got permission from you. That means that I didn't break my promise with Jesus.. *wink2*

So, BB torch 9800 is actually a symbol of God's blessing to me. In everything you do, don't depend on luck, but you depend on God.

So, good luck  God bless, everyone!

My Very Special Xmas Gift~

Just saw the exam result I was very satisfied.

Thank you Jesus, thank you St Joseph of Cupertino for giving me a very special Xmas gift!

;) 

Have a merry, blessed and joyous Christmas everyone~!!

Putting Our Trust in Him

photo source: here

It's the Advent Season and what is a better Christmas present than to share some good news with my brothers and sisters in Christ, right? For all ye Christians especially Catholics, the knowledge about Chaplet of Mercy or Divine Mercy is crucial.

The Chaplet of Divine Mercy (or the Divine Mercy Chaplet) is a Catholic devotional prayer based on the visions of Polish nun Sister Faustina Kowalska. In the 1930s, Sister Faustina had received visions from the Lord asking to spread His message of mercy throughout the world. She also received instructions on how to pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet. The Catholic Church teaches that anyone who recites this prayer at the hour of death will receive great mercy. Jesus also promises that anything can be obtained with this prayer, provided that it is compatible with God’s Will. This prayer can be recited with or without a rosary. 

 (source of information: here)

I did recite this prayers occasionally when I had the motivation, but after reading about the outcome of this prayer, I regret not reciting this prayer diligently like I should. Chaplet of Mercy is best recite at 3 am, but since I am at dreamland that hour, my family and I would recite it at 3 pm in the afternoon.

I remember, during this holiday, me, my mother and my sister Mel were reciting this prayer and we made a petition so that our beloved cat Kitty, who did not come back since the day before, to come back to us. (Yeah, we sometimes dedicate prayer to our pet). That same afternoon, about 4 pm, one hour after we prayed, Kitty came back and meowed to us. Imagine our gratefulness to the Lord that moment for answering our prayer that soon~!

There are a lot of miraculous and great effects of this prayer shared by Brother Stanley C. Villavicencio of the Philippines about this prayer. I will share with you on the coming post. Right now, for those who are not familiar with this prayer, I would like to share with you how to recite this prayer.

 photo source: here 

1) Begin by touching the crucifix and make the sign of the cross.

2) Start by reciting one OUR FATHER, one HAIL MARY  and continue with the one APOSTLES CREED. 

3)  By referring to the picture, pray this at the center medal.

ETERNAL FATHER, I offer You the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Your dearly beloved Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world.

4)  On the 10 beads, recite this prayer:

FOR THE SAKE OF HIS SORROWFUL PASSION, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

5) On the red beads (refer to the picture) where we usually recite the Our Father during the Rosary, you recite the same prayer just like at no 3. 

ETERNAL FATHER, I offer You the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Your dearly beloved Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world.

6) Continue the pattern of praying ten clear beads followed by a red bead until you come back to the center medal.

7)  On the center medal pray three times:

HOLY GOD, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One, have mercy on us and on the whole world.

8) Include this prayer after step 7. 

'Eternal God, in whom mercy is endless and the treasury of compassion inexhaustible, look kindly upon us and increase Your mercy in us, that in difficult moments we might not despair nor become despondent, but with great confidence submit ourselves to Your Holy Will, which is Love and Mercy itself.

 

9) End by touching the crucifix and pray The Sign of the Cross.

SOURCE OF PRAYING STEPS:  HERE

Enjoy this Christmas gift from me and don't forget to share this gift with your other brothers and sisters in Christ too yeah~! Have a blessed Christmas in advance~!

Kids, I Ain't Kidding You~

Imagine... you have prepared your lessons the night before. You read the Gospel like you never did before just because you wanted to relate your teaching with the Gospel today. You had planned what you wanted to teach, what you wanted to mention during the class. You wanted to do your best in your lesson today, but then, when you entered the class, there was one kid, kept running around the class with noises and gave a lot of troubles for the class. You wanted to ignore him, but he won't let you. When you give him attention, he was rebelling against you. You are clueless what he wants from you.

ARGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Meet Ray (bukan nama sebenar) a kid who won't let you teach in peace, and yours truly, a part-time Catechism teacher who is truly clueless about handling kids like Ray.

It was Elo and my turn today to teach the Catechism class to the Standard 2 pupils at the Church of Our Lady of Sorrows. And guess what, I thought Ray could have behaved better today than my last experience with him, but boy I was so wrong. His negative vibes was spreading to the other kids, but thank God, really, really thank God that I had the lollipops that Claire gave to me that kept some of them well-behaved through out the lesson.

I threatened not to give them the lollipops if they do not behave - and it worked *wink2*- but not with Ray. He was oh-so-impossible. (-_-") His little brother, Morrie (bukan nama sebenar) was more well-behaved than him - as far as I remember, and I ain't sure what to do with him. I guess I need help from my sister next year if we met him again.

Well, what we did today was that, I asked Ray to lead the opening prayer by reading the prayer prepared in the text book. He was trying to be funny at first but when I said the word 'Lollipop', he began to behave... but for a little while. (-_-")

Then, after like teaching them about the two lessons from the book, I asked them to write their own prayers - because at the start of the lesson, when I asked them about the prayer they recited before they eat, all the answers I got was Hail Mary and Our Father. So, I wanted them to be creative and try to compose their own prayers. I mean, I want them to pray from their heart, and not from their memory. I mean, how many vocabulary of the Our Father and Hail Mary that a kid really understand? Right? I didn't understand most of the vocab when I was their age. Yea, I am aware that they need to know about the prayers but let's not limit their prayers - let them pray too for what they want from their heart.

Some of them did good job in composing their own prayer while some of the kids' own prayer was kinda cute. Lol. "God, please help me. Please God." -- An excerpt from Harry 's (bukan nama sebenar) prayer. Then there was this girl, Nicky (bukan nama sebenar), where her prayer really was the best among the rest so far. Her prayer was like "God, please help me. Please help the people with no hand, please help the people with no home." I was like, "Wow, look kids. Her prayer is good because she is not only praying for herself but for others too. I want you to include others in your prayer."

The kids in the class, each of them is different from the other. There are hyperactive while there is some who's so quiet.

Overall, my two times experience with the kids were really good, though Ray is kinda out of control. Maybe it's just that phase, that naughty phase of your childhood. Once he grow older, he will be more in control perhaps. *cross fingers*

We were really blessed to have the chance to experience teaching these kids. Hopefully the next semester we will be more prepared to face the children. ;)

Welcome to "Hate the Coward Anonymous Comment Leaver on the Blog" Club

Just left my blog for two weeks and saw a new comment on my previous post titled "Have I mentioned that..." I got a few positive welcoming back comments from all except for one particular comment, the comment posted by an anonymous coward which sounded like this:

"Hey dont read that rubbish bible.
Nothing holy about it.

Jesus Christ was a jewish rabbi.

People who followed his teaching were Christians. The Catholic Christians believed that u must go through vatican to go to heaven. Can u believe that?

The Pope issued Papal Bull so that the Spanish and Portuguese killed aborigines the world over like in Avatar.

The Catholic Christian is an evil cult. The Pope should be tried for crime against humanity over the centuries even here in Malaysia, the Catholic Christians attacked Malacca and killed Malays.

China and Japan banned Christian missionaries. Good Chinese.

The priest sodomised boys and girls."



I mean, what's the point of stationg all of that to me? What the heck? You think I am going to believe what you written through anonymous comment over my own belief which I had practiced for 22 years on earth?

Get a life, or even, get a religion. I bet you don't have one.

Anyone encounter the same problem with anonymous comment leaver??

How I replied to this?

Hmm... Easy...

Hi unknown coward evil visitor,

you're too naive if u think i will believe all the things u said by being anonymous. if u think you're stating the truth, why don't u put on your link or show who u are?

I may not be the holiest of the holiest, I may not read the Bible daily, but once a person try to challenge my faith or try to say that my belief is wrong, I can be defensive. Though I do not have sufficient Biblical knowledge, I experience God's love, I am happy with my belief, I love Jesus, and I know that He loves me, I am happy the way I am.

To the Anonymous Comment Leaver:
Your agenda to shatter my faith backfired. You just made me realized how much I love my religion and how much lucky I am to be a Catholic. I will try to forgive you since that's what I learned from the Bible. :)

He Came, He Looked, and He Asked for Money...

Date: 2nd April 2010
Location: In front of Our Lady of Sorrows Church
Time: Around 7.45 pm or later, after Good Friday service.

The rain was pouring down heavily. Each one of us who just attended the Good Friday service was very hungry. Step, Man Lee, me and several of our juniors were deciding which cafe or restaurant to go to during that rainy day.

"Let's go to Prangin Mall," was the final decision that we made. While waiting for the others to join us, suddenly a man of about 50 year old appeared and talked to us with his fluent English.

"Hello, I am a Catholic too, I just attended the Good Friday service," he started to introduce himself. " I came to Penang to attend this service from my hometown in Perak, and I needed to go back tonight. But the bus fare is RM8, and I only have RM5," he elaborated, while sheltering himself with his right hand. He looked quite in a pitiful state, but that time, I was sceptical, and quite annoyed, because he was using the tactic to create a dilemma in us for being a Christian who just came back from church. It was as if, since we were going to church, we should be good enough to show some sympathy and do some good deeds to him. The hidden premise is that, if we do not help him, what's the use of us going to church then?

"I need some money to go back home, " he continued.

I was thinking, okay, maybe I would help to contribute only RM1 in case if he really needed the cash. But before I could say or do anything, my junior, Joe, took out his RM 10 note and gave it to the man without saying much.

The man, of course, was very happy, and responded with "God bless you!!" and walked away in the downpouring rain.

Most of us were looking at Joe with our wide-eyed expressions.

"Joe~" was the only word that came out from our mouths during our speechless moment.

"Mana tau kalau dia benar-benar perlu duit tu," was his answer. Then we agreed with him.

"Ya, betul, " Man Lee agreed with Joe's decision. It is because, if he really needed the money, we would be committing sins of omissions for not helping him, but if he was lying to us, well, he was the one sinning, and we were not to bear the guilt of not helping him. But still deep down in me, I wouldn't offer that much to the person whom I still doubted, but since Joe was generous and all that, maybe it was okay. God bless him.


FAST FORWARD TO THE FOLLOWING SATURDAY...
Date: 10th April 2010
Location: the hawker stall area at Sunway Hotel, near Our Lady of Sorrows Church
Time: Around 8 pm or later, after Sunset Mass

We were sitting at our usual place before having our dinner. Me, Claire, Natalia, Mike, Deidre and Mike's future girlfriend, ahem, V*v**n, were trying to decide what to eat before we order the food. Suddenly, a man appeared at our table, he somewhat looked kinda familiar to me, and he spoke in English. He was greeting us with some "Hi Christian " thingy and tried to remind us of our responsibility as Christians, or precisely, Catholic. He was asking for money to go back to his hometown, and this rang a bell in me.

No wonder he looked familiar! He was the same guy who asked for money from us when we finish our Good Friday service a week earlier. OMG, and he was still using the same old crappy story to gain our sympathy, but too bad you're busted, fraud~! Checkmate! The same old Why-you-Christian should-help-me crap and talking about how good if he could go back to his hometown now. Gosh, he wasn't creative for a fraud, huh?

I interrupted him and told him that "Weren't you the same guy who asked for money last week? Hadn't you got your money to go back to your hometown already? My junior gave you the money, and it was RM10!" My words were more or less like that, based on my weak memory. The mean gene inside me was pouring out.

He looked at me, then he said something like this "You must be mistaken! I just came here today," he tried to fool me. What did he think I am? A cow?

"No, no, no! I am sure it was you! You told the same story, going back to your home town, you're a Catholic," I said and at the same time he was talking continually to Mike and V*v**n, maybe trying his luck? Lol.. We were not born yesterday, my dear fraud. Before he went away, he said "God bless you!" and I replied "God bless you too," with a goofy smile.

In my heart, I was thinking, "Oh, no Joe... Too bad your good deed was wasted on a fraud like him." But I guess it's the intention that matters, no matter to whom the help was offered to, even for a fraud..


I guess, to be fooled once, is okay, but to be fooled twice, no way. I wouldn't give in to that. I know maybe he really needed the money, but why did he need to lie to get them? By the way, he's healthy, and he could probably get a job, but I guess, with his reputation as a fraud, it was hard for him to get any. To help a parasite is also a sin, at least for me. So, next time, to be fooled by a person once, it's his fault. But to be fooled twice by the same person, it could be your fault.

Moral of the story: Next time, make a deal with people whom you are helping. If he/she wants the money from you, the condition is this: THEY HAVE TO TAKE A PICTURE WITH YOU! HEHE. SEE IF THEY WILL STILL WANT TO FOOL YOU IN THE FUTURE?

We All Need Help to Study..

I got this prayer card from a priest back in high school (when I was form 5 or form 6, I don't really remember)- and I think this prayer is a big help for those Christians asking for guidance in study.

Prayer before Study (by St Thomas Aquinas)

Lord God Supreme, who out of the treasures of Thy Wisdom has set up three orders of angels to rule the heavens in sweet order and hast filled the earth with beauty and plenty; do Thou Fount of Light and wisdom and source of all life and goodness, graciously shed the radiance of Thine own brightness on the darkness of my mind and take from me the sin and ignorance in which I was born.

Thou who makest eloquent the tongue of little children, fashion my words and pour upon my lips the grace of Thy benediction. Grant me penetration to understand, capacity to retain, method and facility in study and abundant grace of expression. Order the beginning, direct the progress, perfect the achievement of my work, Thou who art true God and true Man and livest and reignest for ever and ever. Amen.

I'm Alive...

But my blog wasn't, during the Raya holidays till now..

Okay, the reason was that I had a little problem signing in to Gmail and all the google accounts, thank God that there wasn't any really important e-mail in my inbox these few days. Well, the other reason that I hate to admit was that I wasn't motivated to blog. Facebook had taken 99% of my attention and energy. ;S

There were many activities during the holiday but I don't have the time to list them all out here. If only I could upload the pictures here and let them do the talking, or perhaps writing, in this context.

Today, as usual, I am going to attend the CUS weekly gathering, but this week it's a bit different. I have to handle the worship part. I don't know how to handle this. I won't freak out if it was something like behind the curtain thingy but this thing, I am sure gonna be dead. Yeah, I know, for some of you who have been a professional in handling praise and worship will think that it's not a big deal to handle just one part, which is the worship part. BUT.. for someone like me, who doesn't like to do presentation or standing in front of public, I just have a rough idea on how to handle it. Plus, worship thingy is the slow sentimental part, you gotta build the feel, you gotta make people feel touched through your prayer but me, I don't have that skill, like Debbie (former CUS exco) and Harianna has. Both of them were very good in handling praise and worship and I salute them for that.

Today, I have lots of things to do in my mind, my assignments, activitiy and again assignments.. Huhuhu..

Oh, Lord.. Help me not to sing in squeaky voice and help me to be able to touch people through my voice..And help me to complete the assignment days before the deadline. Amen..

* Insert Car Wash song, by Christina Aguilera feat Missy Elliott *

The date was 6th September 2009. It was a historical day. I went on a car wash under the CUS club at the Immaculate Conception church that day. The car wash was to raise fund for the CUS activities, especially the upcoming ICG camp. I woke up as early as 4.45 am because I was to check attendance for the members who will wait at the Sungai Dua station. My Gosh, it was damn cold showering early in the morning. I used to shower at 6 am and also around 5.3o am something but to shower at 4 something in the morning was like the champion of coldness. Thank God there were not many hostel mates who witnessed me shivering like crazy. Fuh~! I arrived at the Sungai Dua pondok as early as 6.15 am, and of course I was the first to be there. Then, there were only 5 people who turned up at the Sungai Dua station, because majority of the CUS members who participated in this car wash waited at the RST gate.

Around 7.30 am, we arrived at the Immaculate Conception church. The church was a beautiful church and it was quite a shame I never attended a Mass there. I usually went to the Our Lady of Sorrows (OLS) church, because it was the nearest church to USM.

Cheng Yee, Arthur, Marcela and me were responsible to lure the parishioners who attended the Mass to let us wash their cars. We were divided into groups, and my group only consist of four people, namely Clevellen, Eduard, Veraneeta and me. I was in a dilemma situation as I wanted to promise the customers that we would give them a good wash as I was aware that their expectations are high, as most of them were from wealthy background. It was a far different scenario compared to the parishioners at OLS church because most of us at OLS church came by buses instead of our own transportations. But thank God there were some of them who let us wash their cars merely for the donation purpose. Some even gave donation without us needing to wash their cars. The priest was the generous of all as he gave our club RM50 just to wash one car, and then he was the one who gave us permission to have a car wash activity going on there. ;) Thank you, Father!

We had a fun time washing the cars though tiring. Well, maybe I wasn't that tired compared to the others as I didn't really wash the cars because I had to search for customers. I was quite nervous because we were running out of time to finish washing the cars that time, but thank God some of the customers were not in a hurry to go back, so we had enough time to finish washing their cars. Phew~!

The scenario of the car washers, busy cleaning up the washing tools after finishing the activity.

Eduard @ Diva and Siaw Yan were posing as I took their pictures. Anyone interested to let them model your products in the future? ;)

Our happy faces after finishing the car wash. What an achievement. Hooray~!

We raised quite a lot of money for this car wash. Hopefully, there will be less financial worries for the ICG camp. ;)

On another note, I just wanted to mention about the fun night out every week with my sister and seniors after the Sunset Mass. I did not take this for granted though we do it quite often. Every moment spent together was to be treasured as I am aware that the next semester, we might not go to church together again as they would be involved in teaching practicals.

So, I immortalized this fun moment we had together last week here.

I'm soooo gonna miss you all the next semester!!!!! (*=*)

Moment of Reflection..

It's the first day of the Holy week but I do not feel holy at all. Well, at least today was more productive than the previous day because I managed to clean my room, and do my laundry, etc. (Woohoo~!! The feeling of after doing my laundry was so good, I mean, minus 50% of my worries). I guess, by cleaning the room, I can at least, maybe change the atmosphere of my room and make it more appealing to start my revision, which, unfortunately, has not taken place (YET)..

Majority of my hostel mates had gone back to their hometowns, leaving the hostel half empty, but it's weird, cause I do not feel lonely at all. I mean, yeah, we got all the insects and animals near Fajar which may accompany us, but I feel as if I am not alone, probably because I am glued to my laptop screen almost 95% if my awake moment. It's an imbalance routine I know, but I can't help it. Then, there was this beautiful forwarded message which I'd received from my bestie Amanda, who is currently studying in Swinburne, Kuching.

HOLY WEEK REFLECTIONS

1) Sometimes, God breaks our spirit to save our soul.

2) Sometimes, He break our heart to make us whole.

3) Sometimes, He send us pain so we can be stronger.

4) Sometimes, He sends us failure so we can be humble.

5) Sometimes, He sends us illness so we can take better care of ourselves.

6) Sometimes, He takes "EVERYTHING" away from us so we can learn the value of "EVERYTHING" we have.



THough, I received quite a lot of similar messages like this, it never fails to touch my heart to read this messages. THough, most of us maybe have seen this message before, but have we really put it into practise, to not take for granted everything we have? It's sad that we are always aware of our flaws, our weaknesses, but we never try to improvise them. Therefore, we did not sin out of ignorance, but we sinned out of ignoring.

I admit, that I am never satisfied with what I have. Now I know that we should have been thankful and not complaining what we already had. I hope, I at least, will try to be holy during this Holy Week. I've failed myself everytime in terms of fasting before Easter. I never did really fast, but I think during this study week, I am trying to fast because, hehe, I am running out of food by the way.