How many of us like to be criticized?
How many of us like to criticize?
I bet the number of those saying 'yes' to the second question would be higher than the former.
Because, as human, it is easier to find fault in others than to admit to others that we are imperfect though we are aware of how imperfect we are.
I am one of those who constantly get criticisms from others, and don't get me wrong, I do appreciate criticism from people, but there are certain types of criticism that I despised. I admit I like to criticize too, but now I only do it to give positive criticism (a criticism to motivate) and for the negative criticism, I only do it as "counter attack" (meaning, I only do it when people did it to me first *wink2* ).
For me, criticism has two effects on those being criticized, whether it:
There was once, someone criticized my baking ability (for heaven's sake, I only tried baking once so how can you evaluate my baking skill based on my first try?), saying that I should stick to only cooking and not try baking. I was like OUCH. I mean, I know I am not good in baking but hello~ I made the horrible cupcakes without using the proper baking utensils and I didn't follow the real recipes. So I knew there should be room for improvement. Unless I was using all the utensils and followed the recipes properly, then your criticism might just be appropriate.
So my response to the 'someone' who criticized me was
"The more you are trying to ask me not to do it, the more I want to do it."
And I dislike a criticism which asked me to stop trying something because that just might lead me to have a negative thought on you:
So guys and girls, when you are criticizing, please criticize to improve instead of discourage. If someone did a mistake that they REALIZED, there is no need for you to remind them and make them feel bad about it, or the worst part of it is to ask them stop doing something that they like just because they are not good at it.
I am one of those who constantly get criticisms from others, and don't get me wrong, I do appreciate criticism from people, but there are certain types of criticism that I despised. I admit I like to criticize too, but now I only do it to give positive criticism (a criticism to motivate) and for the negative criticism, I only do it as "counter attack" (meaning, I only do it when people did it to me first *wink2* ).
For me, criticism has two effects on those being criticized, whether it:
a) make you aware of your own imperfection and motivate you to improve myself
or
b) discourage you to do something you like cause the critics make you felt as if you do not deserve to be where you are.
There was once, someone criticized my baking ability (for heaven's sake, I only tried baking once so how can you evaluate my baking skill based on my first try?), saying that I should stick to only cooking and not try baking. I was like OUCH. I mean, I know I am not good in baking but hello~ I made the horrible cupcakes without using the proper baking utensils and I didn't follow the real recipes. So I knew there should be room for improvement. Unless I was using all the utensils and followed the recipes properly, then your criticism might just be appropriate.
So my response to the 'someone' who criticized me was
"The more you are trying to ask me not to do it, the more I want to do it."
And I dislike a criticism which asked me to stop trying something because that just might lead me to have a negative thought on you:
" Are you insecure that if I am motivated and trying to improve myself and finally succeeded, then you would feel like you're left behind cause you're not a good baker (ahem that hurts right)? Hmm.. *wonder* "
So guys and girls, when you are criticizing, please criticize to improve instead of discourage. If someone did a mistake that they REALIZED, there is no need for you to remind them and make them feel bad about it, or the worst part of it is to ask them stop doing something that they like just because they are not good at it.
Unless they did not realize it, then your intervention is much appreciated.
It's okay to criticize,
but remember..... do it in a nice way.
Thank you.
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8 comments:
so nampaknya u have to bersyukur with my criticism yg ada unsur2 suggestions di dlmnya. cth, "kenapa anda tak ketuk pintu dulu sebelum masuk? bodoh betul!" at least ada bagi petua utk bertindak dgn betul rite? hahahah :p
p/s: mcm kenal je sapa yg kata u shud stick to cooking... hahaha.
ceit (kata ceit gaya Step).. ur criticism need to put 'bodoh betul' meh? heh. that's so demotivational...
p/s: kenapa, pernah jadi mangsa kritikan beliau ka? dia Along ba.. :P
siapa yg x pernah jadi mangsa kritikan beliau? tapi beliau x berani nak criticize teruk2 my culinary skill. wahaha, sebab obviously hers is worse :p wakakaka
skrg beliau suka mengutuk skill pemikiran rasional beta. tapi beta ratu putar belit so in the end, beliau pun rasa dpt relate dgn apa yg diperkatakan oleh beta. wakaka
mula2 rasa nak komen pasal entri, then terus tukar fikiran bila baca komen anda berdua..hehehe
i've been criticized a number of times, sometimes behind my back and sometimes to my face. it's all about how we take those criticisms at the end of the day.
Who cares if one person criticized your baking. Take it in and prove to yourself that you can do it! I know you can :)
criticism is hard to handle. be it good or bad. I for one, can just handle certain criticism but not all. we all have feelings I guess and despite the fact that I say i can handle criticism, i find it hard to do so sometimes. I only answer back if it hurts. if i keep quiet, then it means the criticism is true. lol. my defensive nature makes me like this. :P
it's okay mau. u should take that criticism as a challenge to do better.. practice makes perfect! :)
Mel: yea, nampaknya kita semua jadik mangsa beliau. hahah
Cik Hawa: lol. wah, apa komen yg anda nak kata sebenarnya? lol. boleh fb msg kepada saya. ;)
Erisha: Yea, couldn't agree more with you. And thanks for the motivation to bake! ;)
Amanda: Yea, true what u said. sometimes, the one who criticized overlooked our feelings and hurt us. Yea, i am going to practice, after i get over this lazy feeling i am having right now. ;)
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